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Don't Be a Christmas Tree Diver

A certain kind of diver makes guides groan. This diver assembles his gear, and then reaches for his dive bag and breaks out the accessories. I watch in disbelief as he slides a mesh tank protector over the rental tank, and then proceeds to clip on to his buoyancy compensator large slates, a magnetic etch-a-sketch, dive tables, blinking tank strobe lights, a tank banger, low pressure hose noise maker, a shaker, a camera, a fish ID slate, a flash light, fancy octopus holder, a surface marker buoy without a reel to deploy it, mesh collecting bags (for trash?), and various types of extra clips and hose retractors "just in case". In the dive industry we call this kind of diver a "Christmas tree diver" (CTD) because he has so many doodads hanging off of him that he looks like a well-ornamented Christmas tree. 
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Versão traduzida para Português usando google translator aqui:

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